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Jason Goes To Hell And Into Some Weird Places

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Welcome back, dear readers! The Mausoleum of Memories is open and ready for business, so please gather around. Don’t forget to take off your heads and bow your hats – or maybe it’s the other way around? – as we pay our respects to the deliriously departed dead. Our old pal Jason has finally gone where all good little murderers find themselves. No, not Milwaukee – Hell. That’s right! In this edition we take a look back at Jason Goes to Hell.

Image via That Was A Bit Mental

This movie had everything going for it at the time. Chiefly being – Sean S. Cunningham was returning to the film series he created. Unbeknownst to us at the time though, Cunningham was only coming back to the beloved franchise because he wanted to make Freddy vs. Jason, a movie that wouldn’t see the light of day for another ten years. Jason Goes to Hell was a film meant to spark people’s interests in the upcoming monster brawl and keep the series rolling.

Image via JoBlo

Once again, Kane Hodder would wear the iconic hockey mask and fans expected one Hell of a movie out of this experience, if for nothing but the very title of the movie alone!

However, there were meetings happening behind the scenes none of the die-hard loyalists were aware of at the time. Plans were being made to not only shift the franchise into unfamiliar territory, but the people behind JGtH intended to ignore all previous films except for the first two.

This was something new-comer director Adam Marcus was very open to. The team was looking to do something brand new and were willing to take a lot of risks. Also according to Marcus, Cunningham dictated the plot and went so far as to tell him, “I want that damn hockey mask out of the movie. So whatever you come up with, let’s make that movie.”

That sentiment is not widely shared though.

“Jason is not nearly as scary when the mask comes off. Even if his face is hideously deformed, the ominous presence of that mask is what really makes the character.” – Kane Hodder, ‘Jason Voorhees’. Personally, I couldn’t agree more. The mask Jason wears is not simply vital to that character, but is part of the character.

Image via Alamo Drafthouse Cineam

Noel Cunningham (Crystal Lake Entertainment) admitted that they decided to mess with the mythology a little bit as well, and even uses Halloween III: Season of the Witch – a movie that threw Michael Myers out of the franchise and has outraged many fans of Halloween to this very day – as inspiration.

In the stunning documentary Crystal Lake Memories, actor John D. LeMay admits the plan was: “To create a mythology out of these previous eight films that really weren’t in any way leading to a mythology, so he had to kind of create it from scratch.”

Did all these innovative plans work out? And how does the movie hold up?

Image via We Minored In Film

Jason Goes to Hell opens with a lone camper who has her late-night shower interrupted by the sudden appearance of Jason Voorhees. There is no lead up, nor is there any exposition prerequisite to the scene. Jason just shows up ready to kill.

I have to admit that this particular look for Jason is one of my top two favorites. The tumorous growths around his lumpy head gives him a diseased look. The putrid flesh has also grown into the mask and just looks gruesome as well as painful.

Image via Rotten Ink

The camper escapes her close call with a violent death and upon chasing her outside Jason finds himself in a top secret trap laid out by the FBI. To the dismay of many, many, many fans Jason is then blown up into iddy-biddy pieces. Right at the beginning of the movie.

So now what? With our beloved killer blown to Hell already, what could they possibly do to fill the span of an entire film to make it worth our while?

Not to fear, everyone! Plenty of killer antics were in store for us, as well as some gory goodness. And we didn’t have long to wait.

Now, the coroner examining the charred remains of poor Jason must have skipped lunch. Because out of nowhere, that barbecued heart of Jason’s sure must have looked tasty and the man just couldn’t help himself and had to take a big ol’ juicy bite.

Image via Wicked Horror

The man gnaws on the oozing heart until he finds himself possessed by the evil spirit of Jason. So…Jason’s dead but also alive and is now being carried around like a parasitic demon worm passing from one host to the next.

It may sound as though I’m making fun of this movie, but I’m honestly just breaking the film’s plot down. This is a weird entry to the franchise, and usually met with a lot of hostility from the fans. It certainly goes into some strange territory.

Image via Mildy Pleased

For example, we learn about Jason’s long-lost sister, a character we’ve never heard about in any of the eight previous films in the established franchise.

Also there is a Jason hunter, Creighton Duke (Steven Williams) who knows everything there is to know about Jason, but he’s someone we (the fans ) know not a single thing about. He just shows up – like everyone else in this movie – with no lead up, talks about how he thinks of little girls in pretty dresses (Creep!) and then breaks the fingers of our protagonist in exchange for some vital Jason-stopping information.

Wouldn’t it have been more interesting if this had been Tommy Jarvis? It would have at least tied into the rest of the franchise and given this odd movie a bit more credibility. It would also have given fans more of a connection, rather than a constant sense of isolation. Or at the very least it would have been easy to add some line in his dialogue saying he had been trained by Tommy and that’s why he’s so good at tracking Jason down.

Image via Friday the 13th Wiki

All I’m saying is there’s a reason the game included Tommy Jarvis as a playable character, and not Duke.

What hurts this movie among fans is its complete disconnection to the previous entries. It has the feeling of a bizarre standalone project.

Even the movie that followed it (Jason X) completely ignores the events of Jason Goes to Hell. As a matter of fact it almost feels more like a direct sequel to Manhattan. At the end of Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan, we see Jason melt and get washed away. Then at the beginning of Jason X we see the big guy locked together in chains and David Cronenberg explains that the monster is priceless to biological research because of his ability to regenerate and never die.

Image via That Was A Bit Mental

As in yes, he melted away in Manhattan, but later his cells reconstructed back together again giving him new life. Which – when you think about it – certainly would explain why Jason looks differently from movie to movie.

Jason Goes to Hell is kind of its own little thing though. It doesn’t bridge any story gaps between the series. It does some truly weird things that are completely out of character for a character we all know and love. For instance, Jason doesn’t talk. He can’t. However, Jason does talk in Goes to Hell and it’s had fans’ heads spinning ever since.

Image via Klejonka

Does it deserve to be hated? No. Despite all of its quirkiness it’s still a fun movie to watch, and at the heart of all these films that’s the point. They’re fun to watch. We might have to click our brains off or lower our expectations a little before watching Goes to Hell, but like I said, Kane Hodder looks amazing in the makeup.

And the marketing for this movie was outstanding! We were all pumped to see this one. The poster alone was enough to make us sneak into the theater against our parents’ wishes.

Image via Pinterest

I still like this one, regardless of its break with continuity.

Truth is, we loved it for the thing it promised – an upcoming battle between both of our favorite slasher killers. At the end of Goes to Hell we see a discarded hockey mask laying in the sand. Suddenly a familiar razor-tipped glove bursts out of the ground and drags the mask down to what we can only presume to be Hell where Freddy is waiting to fight Jason.

Image via Morbidly Beautiful

This was the best advertisement to Freddy vs Jason ever! And we couldn’t wait to see that gruesome fight.

What if Jason Goes to Hell is indeed perfectly canon and doesn’t break any continuity? What if the whole movie is a terrible dream Jason is having during his regenerative phase? What if that’s the foothold Freddy needed to get inside Jason’s head and set in motion the events of Freddy vs Jason?

Image via michalak

I’m cool with that.

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Another Creepy Spider Movie Hits Shudder This Month

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Good spider films are a theme this year. First, we had Sting and then there was Infested. The former is still in theaters and the latter is coming to Shudder starting April 26.

Infested has been getting some good reviews. People are saying that it’s not only a great creature feature but also a social commentary on racism in France.

According to IMDb: Writer/director Sébastien Vanicek was looking for ideas around the discrimination faced by black and Arab-looking people in France, and that led him to spiders, which are rarely welcome in homes; whenever they’re spotted, they’re swatted. As everyone in the story (people and spiders) is treated like vermin by society, the title came to him naturally.

Shudder has become the gold standard for streaming horror content. Since 2016, the service has been offering fans an expansive library of genre movies. in 2017, they began to stream exclusive content.

Since then Shudder has become a powerhouse in the film festival circuit, buying distribution rights to movies, or just producing some of their own. Just like Netflix, they give a film a short theatrical run before adding it to their library exclusively for subscribers.

Late Night With the Devil is a great example. It was released theatrically on March 22 and will begin streaming on the platform starting April 19.

While not getting the same buzz as Late Night, Infested is a festival favorite and many have said if you suffer from arachnophobia, you might want to take heed before watching it.

Infested

According to the synopsis, our main character, Kalib is turning 30 and dealing with some family issues. “He’s fighting with his sister over an inheritance and has cut ties with his best friend. Fascinated by exotic animals, he finds a venomous spider in a shop and brings it back to his apartment. It only takes a moment for the spider to escape and reproduce, turning the whole building into a dreadful web trap. The only option for Kaleb and his friends is to find a way out and survive.”

The film will be available to watch on Shudder starting April 26.

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Part Concert, Part Horror Movie M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Trap’ Trailer Released

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In true Shyamalan form, he sets his film Trap inside a social situation where we aren’t sure what is going on. Hopefully, there is a twist at the end. Furthermore, we hope it’s better than the one in his divisive 2021 movie Old.

The trailer seemingly gives away a lot, but, as in the past, you can’t rely on his trailers because they are often red herrings and you are being gaslit to think a certain way. For instance, his movie Knock at the Cabin was completely different than what the trailer implied and if you hadn’t read the book on which the film is based it was still like going in blind.

The plot for Trap is being dubbed an “experience” and we aren’t quite sure what that means. If we were to guess based on the trailer, it’s a concert movie wrapped around a horror mystery. There are original songs performed by Saleka, who plays Lady Raven, a kind of Taylor Swift/Lady Gaga hybrid. They have even set up a Lady Raven website to further the illusion.

Here is the fresh trailer:

According to the synopsis, a father takes his daughter to one of Lady Raven’s jam-packed concerts, “where they realize they’re at the center of a dark and sinister event.”

Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Trap stars Josh Hartnett, Ariel Donoghue, Saleka Shyamalan, Hayley Mills and Allison Pill. The film is produced by Ashwin Rajan, Marc Bienstock and M. Night Shyamalan. The executive producer is Steven Schneider.

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Woman Brings Corpse Into Bank To Sign Loan Papers

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Warning: This is a disturbing story.

You have to be pretty desperate for money to do what this Brazilian woman did at the bank to get a loan. She wheeled in a fresh corpse to endorse the contract and she seemingly thought the bank employees wouldn’t notice. They did.

This weird and disturbing story comes via ScreenGeek an entertainment digital publication. They write that a woman identified as Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes pushed a man she identified as her uncle into the bank pleading with him to sign loan papers for $3,400. 

If you’re squeamish or easily triggered, be aware that the video captured of the situation is disturbing. 

Latin America’s largest commercial network, TV Globo, reported on the crime, and according to ScreenGeek this is what Nunes says in Portuguese during the attempted transaction. 

“Uncle, are you paying attention? You must sign [the loan contract]. If you don’t sign, there’s no way, as I cannot sign on your behalf!”

She then adds: “Sign so you can spare me further headaches; I can’t bear it any longer.” 

At first we thought this might be a hoax, but according to Brazilian police, the uncle, 68-year-old Paulo Roberto Braga had passed away earlier that day.

 “She attempted to feign his signature for the loan. He entered the bank already deceased,” Police Chief Fábio Luiz said in an interview with TV Globo. “Our priority is to continue investigating to identify other family members and gather more information regarding this loan.”

If convicted Nunes could be facing jail time on charges of fraud, embezzlement, and desecration of a corpse.

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