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5 Memorable Quotes Bad Boy Christian Slater Gave Us in “Heathers”

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Written by Patti Pauley

If the 1989 cult dark comedy classic Heathers taught us anything, it’s that social politics in school can be deadly indeed. Especially if you’re a snooty, cheating at croquet bitch named Heather. Add to the mix a devilishly handsome, unstable teen with a murderous agenda to make a political statement and well, you just might want to stay home from that Remington house party.

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While Heathers rocketed both Christian Slater and Winona Ryder into stardom, Slater, who portrayed the rebellious teen killer JD, helped catapult the beloved horror/comedy/drama into the universally loved teenage angst film with some pretty memorable quotes that also served as valuable life lessons. With today being Christian Slater’s birthday, let’s look back at his infamous role as Jason Dean and five of the most sadistic yet sensible lessons his character taught us in preparation for those high school years.

 

 

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Memorable one-liner and lesson numero uno: Be careful who you’re flexing your muscles to; you really never know what’s going on in someone else’s noggin’. Kurt and Ram felt immediately threatened by JD’s way with the ladies, particularly Veronica, the unofficial fourth Heather. So of course, the jock heads make their way to the dark corner of the school cafeteria to inflict their self-proclaimed seniority macho-status of Westerberg High. However, JD isn’t phased a bit and along with the first moral of the story, the next lesson in life is, don’t take any shit off of anyone.

 

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Lesson number two: In the famous words of Breaking Bad’s Mike- “I took a half-measure when I should have gone all the way.”  In the world of Jason Dean, I’m not so sure the word half-measure even exists. Veronica recruits her new found love JD to get even with Heather Chandelier. ‘Ronnie concocts an embarrassing situation involving a mixture of orange juice and milk for the hungover beauty queen. Our, good ole’ JD has a more permanent plan for Heather number one. Although Veronica simply brushes off the idea as a joke, distracted, she accidentally grabs the mug of Hull Clean and serves it to her best friend… and worst enemy. Much to the delight of Westerberg’s new deadly James Dean. The moral here is if you’ve ever threatened or intimidated someone, for fuck’s sake don’t eat or drink anything they give you.

 

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Lesson number three- the squeaky wheel gets the grease… or something like that. Maybe not to JD’s extreme, but it seemed to ward off bumbling senior assholes Kurt and Ram, as this quote refers to the incident between the trio earlier that day in the cafeteria. It also helped to further ignite Veronica’s interest of this dark and mysterious horse in the running of potential teenage suitors.

 

 

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Lesson number four- Ca sera sera, what will be, will be. Of course, our bad boy JD has his own colorful way of expressing this old time saying. Speaking directly to Veronica, “our love is God” refers to the strong and inevitable bond between the two star-crossed lovers with the added slushie line as his way of saying, “We’re awesome, we’re each others destiny, fuck all this bullshit, it’s cherry slushie time and we’re all that matters right now.” 

 

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And last but not least, lesson number five- You say tomato, I say to-mah-to. Which clearly speaks for itself as we’ve all heard the infamous saying at least once or twice. The phrase in itself has various meanings depending on context, but maybe the most important use of the phrase throws back to “we agree to disagree.” And in even shorter words, pick your battles, which is an especially useful reminder in this day in age.

 

Let’s all pause and reflect on the ideologies of Westerberg High’s most charming psychopath and wish the actor who brought him to life, Christian Slater, all the birthday greetings and salutations today!

 

 

 

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Another Creepy Spider Movie Hits Shudder This Month

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Good spider films are a theme this year. First, we had Sting and then there was Infested. The former is still in theaters and the latter is coming to Shudder starting April 26.

Infested has been getting some good reviews. People are saying that it’s not only a great creature feature but also a social commentary on racism in France.

According to IMDb: Writer/director Sébastien Vanicek was looking for ideas around the discrimination faced by black and Arab-looking people in France, and that led him to spiders, which are rarely welcome in homes; whenever they’re spotted, they’re swatted. As everyone in the story (people and spiders) is treated like vermin by society, the title came to him naturally.

Shudder has become the gold standard for streaming horror content. Since 2016, the service has been offering fans an expansive library of genre movies. in 2017, they began to stream exclusive content.

Since then Shudder has become a powerhouse in the film festival circuit, buying distribution rights to movies, or just producing some of their own. Just like Netflix, they give a film a short theatrical run before adding it to their library exclusively for subscribers.

Late Night With the Devil is a great example. It was released theatrically on March 22 and will begin streaming on the platform starting April 19.

While not getting the same buzz as Late Night, Infested is a festival favorite and many have said if you suffer from arachnophobia, you might want to take heed before watching it.

Infested

According to the synopsis, our main character, Kalib is turning 30 and dealing with some family issues. “He’s fighting with his sister over an inheritance and has cut ties with his best friend. Fascinated by exotic animals, he finds a venomous spider in a shop and brings it back to his apartment. It only takes a moment for the spider to escape and reproduce, turning the whole building into a dreadful web trap. The only option for Kaleb and his friends is to find a way out and survive.”

The film will be available to watch on Shudder starting April 26.

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Part Concert, Part Horror Movie M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Trap’ Trailer Released

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In true Shyamalan form, he sets his film Trap inside a social situation where we aren’t sure what is going on. Hopefully, there is a twist at the end. Furthermore, we hope it’s better than the one in his divisive 2021 movie Old.

The trailer seemingly gives away a lot, but, as in the past, you can’t rely on his trailers because they are often red herrings and you are being gaslit to think a certain way. For instance, his movie Knock at the Cabin was completely different than what the trailer implied and if you hadn’t read the book on which the film is based it was still like going in blind.

The plot for Trap is being dubbed an “experience” and we aren’t quite sure what that means. If we were to guess based on the trailer, it’s a concert movie wrapped around a horror mystery. There are original songs performed by Saleka, who plays Lady Raven, a kind of Taylor Swift/Lady Gaga hybrid. They have even set up a Lady Raven website to further the illusion.

Here is the fresh trailer:

According to the synopsis, a father takes his daughter to one of Lady Raven’s jam-packed concerts, “where they realize they’re at the center of a dark and sinister event.”

Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Trap stars Josh Hartnett, Ariel Donoghue, Saleka Shyamalan, Hayley Mills and Allison Pill. The film is produced by Ashwin Rajan, Marc Bienstock and M. Night Shyamalan. The executive producer is Steven Schneider.

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Woman Brings Corpse Into Bank To Sign Loan Papers

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Warning: This is a disturbing story.

You have to be pretty desperate for money to do what this Brazilian woman did at the bank to get a loan. She wheeled in a fresh corpse to endorse the contract and she seemingly thought the bank employees wouldn’t notice. They did.

This weird and disturbing story comes via ScreenGeek an entertainment digital publication. They write that a woman identified as Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes pushed a man she identified as her uncle into the bank pleading with him to sign loan papers for $3,400. 

If you’re squeamish or easily triggered, be aware that the video captured of the situation is disturbing. 

Latin America’s largest commercial network, TV Globo, reported on the crime, and according to ScreenGeek this is what Nunes says in Portuguese during the attempted transaction. 

“Uncle, are you paying attention? You must sign [the loan contract]. If you don’t sign, there’s no way, as I cannot sign on your behalf!”

She then adds: “Sign so you can spare me further headaches; I can’t bear it any longer.” 

At first we thought this might be a hoax, but according to Brazilian police, the uncle, 68-year-old Paulo Roberto Braga had passed away earlier that day.

 “She attempted to feign his signature for the loan. He entered the bank already deceased,” Police Chief Fábio Luiz said in an interview with TV Globo. “Our priority is to continue investigating to identify other family members and gather more information regarding this loan.”

If convicted Nunes could be facing jail time on charges of fraud, embezzlement, and desecration of a corpse.

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