Geese are foul creatures and highly temperamental, just ask anyone who has tried to go up against one and they will tell you it’s one of the most horrifying experiences of their lives. A recent picture circulating the internet has compounded the fear people have of these winged devils as it shows rows of sharp teeth, not only on their beaks but tongues!
But if you’re a smart internet browser you have to take everything you see with a grain of salt, photo editing and deep fakes serve as good veils of the truth. And the Great White-like serrated teeth found in the picture above is just someone having a go. Right?
Wrong. Geese have teeth everywhere and your nightmares have just been fueled.
The sharp teeth are actually made of something called Tomium. It’s hard and spikey cartilage that lines their beaks. The protrusions are as hard as bones which they use to rip through grass, snails, golfers, and anything they damn well please. Drawing blood is a consequence after just one bite.
Whoever decided to add these beasts of hell to our matrix also decided rows of saw-like protrusions weren’t enough just on the beaks but they thought it might be funny to add them to their tongues.
These tongue weapons are mainly used to grasp living prey and human ankles, impaling them to thwart escape. Then they can be ripped apart with the other rows of beak spikes for a hearty meal.
There are bird lovers out there who will probably give me hell for criticizing these winged serpents, and the comments section will fill up with remarks grounded in pseudo-defiance, just for the sake of disagreeing.
I say we put those people in an enclosure with a bunch of these Jaws geese and see how they feel after ten minutes.
I love all animals, except spiders. But they aren’t technically an animal are they? I love birds and yes even geese in the sense that they should not be harmed or killed for fun. So if you see one, or two leave them alone and they will do the same or risk getting your ankles mangled by the equivalent of what can only be described as an avian bandsaw!