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Worst 5 Horror Films of 2019 – Brianna Spieldenner’s Picks

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worst horror films of 2019

As I said in my list of best horror films of 2019, this has been a great year for horror. Unfortunately, not all the horror movies made this year are as great. This list includes my least favorite or least memorable horror movies I saw that came out in 2019, most of which I had high expectations for that left me disappointed. I didn’t include any movies that I didn’t watch, and so it is probably missing the horror movies that I knew were going to suck and didn’t bother to see (Jacob’s Ladder, Countdown). Here are the 5 horror films that disappointed me the most that I saw in 2019. 

Worst 5 Horror Films of 2019

Velvet buzzsaw worst horror movies 2019

5. Velvet Buzzsaw

This movie suffered from trying to reinvent the genre and be more interesting, which I have to admit, I applaud as a bold move. Unfortunately, making risky decisions will either work or won’t, and in my opinion it just didn’t work. This Dan Gilroy (Nightcrawler) film had some heavy acting muscle behind it, with Jake Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo, John Malkovich and Toni Collette, and the story in theory was definitely interesting, but the way that it was executed was just bizarre in a goofy way. The movie has the tone of a satirical Final Destination movie without the memorable deaths and “scariness.”

The movie was supposed to be critical of capitalism and the hollowness of the art scene, but to accomplish that AND to be scary, this film needed to do a lot more. It even lacks any fun that would have saved it from a future of obscurity, but at least we have another wacky Jake Gyllenhaal character. What’s most disappointing is to see this as the film made from the director of the much more dark and tense Nightcrawler

the prodigy

4. The Prodigy

There’s not much to say about this film, because it was so incredibly pointless. The marketing for this film made it seem like it was more than just a carbon copy of every “evil kid” movie, but it was not. Absolutely nothing in this movie was new or interesting and the performances were more than bland. The namesake of the film, the child being a prodigy, never turns out to have any real influence on the plot past the first third of this movie.

I thought it was a weird decision to make Taylor Schilling (Orange is the New Black) the mother in this and I still feel that way after viewing. Weird. The ending ALMOST makes the film more interesting than it is, but it’s too little and too late making this film mediocre. Your time would better be spent watching any of the other child killer movies that this movie copied. 

3 from hell worst horror movies of 2019

3. 3 from Hell

It hurts my heart to think of the newest film by director/musician Rob Zombie. I didn’t absolutely hate it, but comparing it to House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects, which 3 From Hell follows the plot of, it is clear that it isn’t nearly up to par. Reviving the Firefly clan from their epic death scene at the end of The Devil’s Rejects should have been for something meaningful and just as grand of a movie as the previous two, but this film plodded along in its disinterest in the plot and the future of the killers.

Sadly, Sid Haig’s (Captain Spaulding) failing health kept him from taking part in most of the movie, leading his “role” in the group to be switched out with a new character played by Richard Brake (Doom-Head in 31) which, don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t bad in playing, but it lacked any memorable oomph, especially compared to Captain Spaulding. Sheri Moon Zombie returns as Baby, playing pretty much the same character she has always done, but this time with some more truly bizarre scenes resulting from PTSD. Bill Moseley returns as Otis Driftwood, but even his performance feels comical in the lack of action throughout the film.

The only interesting new character I found in this film was Jeff Daniel Phillips (31) as the prison warden, who is only in it for a short section. If you are a fan of the previous two movies in this storyline, I would not recommend ruining the end of The Devil’s Rejects for this, making it one of my worst horror films of 2019.

it: chapter 2

2. It Chapter 2

I wasn’t a big fan of It (2017) but I will admit it was an okay movie that had a huge impact culturally. I could not say the same for the second chapter of the story. Whether you want to blame it on the book or the filmmaker (maybe a little of both) this movie suffered from a poorly thought out plot. The scenes moved forward more like a video game, with the main characters completing task after task to move forward in their mission to destroy the murderous clown, with Mike Hanlon (Isaiah Mustafa) in a bizarre role as some sort of task giver in this dull film. The performances were half-assed, although I think James McAvoy as Bill Denbrough screaming at a biking kid in the middle of the road was one of the funniest scenes I’ve seen this year, which I’m pretty sure was not the intention of the filmmaker at all. I hope that this film doesn’t sully the reputation of the first too much, and honestly hope that this franchise quits while it’s still ahead. 

wounds worst horror films 2019

1. Wounds

I actually was into the first half of this film by Babak Anvari (director of the groundbreaking film Under the Shadow). I was excited to see the new film from this director and I was also a huge fan of Armie Hammer and Dakota Johnson and wanted to see them together in a horror movie. The premise it started with was intriguing enough, and it had a spooky tone that was supported by some disturbing imagery. That is, sadly, all the good I have to say for this movie.

Around the halfway mark, I started realizing that none of the events happening in this film would ever relate to each other.  It seems like the director had a bunch of different shots and ideas in mind that he wanted to use, but didn’t know how to turn them into a coherent plot. By the end of the film, I was so confused with all the things that had been brought up and never mentioned again I was surprised that it ended the way it did with no resolution whatsoever. Overall, the visuals were not bad, but the story was so poorly thought out I couldn’t recommend this film to anyone. If, by chance, you want to watch a film like The Ring and don’t want to pay attention, maybe this is your film. 

So there are my choices for 5 worst movies of 2019. All of these movies disappointed me in their own ways, and mostly from filmmakers that I support. I can only hope that they bounce back from these sub par films.

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‘Blink Twice’ Trailer Presents a Thrilling Mystery in Paradise

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A new trailer for the movie formerly known as Pussy Island just dropped and it has us intrigued. Now with the more restrained title, Blink Twice, this  Zoë Kravitz-directed black comedy is set to land in theaters on August 23.

The film is packed with stars including Channing Tatum, Naomi Ackie, Alia Shawkat, Simon Rex, Adria Arjona, Haley Joel Osment, Christian Slater, Kyle MacLachlan, and Geena Davis.

The trailer feels like a Benoit Blanc mystery; people are invited to a secluded location and disappear one by one, leaving one guest to figure out what is going on.

In the film, a billionaire named Slater King (Channing Tatum) invites a waitress named Frida (Naomi Ackie) to his private island, “It’s paradise. Wild nights blend into sun-soaked days and everyone’s having a great time. No one wants this trip to end, but as strange things start to happen, Frida begins to question her reality. There is something wrong with this place. She’ll have to uncover the truth if she wants to make it out of this party alive.”

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Melissa Barrera Says ‘Scary Movie VI’ Would Be “Fun To Do”

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Melissa Barrera might literally get the last laugh on Spyglass thanks to a possible Scary Movie sequel. Paramount and Miramax are seeing the right opportunity to bring the satirical franchise back into the fold and announced last week one might be in production as early as this fall.

The last chapter of the Scary Movie franchise was almost a decade ago and since the series lampoons thematic horror movies and pop culture trends, it would seem they have a lot of content to draw ideas from, including the recent reboot of slasher series Scream.

Barerra, who starred as final girl Samantha in those movies was abruptly fired from the latest chapter, Scream VII, for expressing what Spyglass interpreted as “antisemitism,” after the actress came out in support of Palestine on social media.

Even though the drama wasn’t a laughing matter, Barrera might get her chance to parody Sam in Scary Movie VI. That is if the opportunity arises. In an interview with Inverse, the 33-year-old actress was asked about Scary Movie VI, and her reply was intriguing.

“I always loved those movies,” the actress told Inverse. “When I saw it announced, I was like, ‘Oh, that would be fun. That would be so fun to do.’”

That “fun to do” part could be construed as a passive pitch to Paramount, but that’s open to interpretation.

Just like in her franchise, Scary Movie also has a legacy cast including Anna Faris and Regina Hall. There is no word yet on if either of those actors will appear in the reboot. With or without them, Barrera is still a fan of the comedies. “They have the iconic cast that did it, so we’ll see what goes on with that. I’m just excited to see a new one,” she told the publication.

Barrera is currently celebrating the box office success of her latest horror movie Abigail.

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Thrills and Chills: Ranking ‘Radio Silence’ Films from Bloody Brilliant to Just Bloody

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Radio Silence Films

Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett, and Chad Villella are all filmmakers under the collective label called Radio Silence. Bettinelli-Olpin and Gillett are the primary directors under that moniker while Villella produces.

They have gained popularity over the past 13 years and their films have become known as having a certain Radio Silence “signature.” They are bloody, usually contain monsters, and have breakneck action sequences. Their recent film Abigail exemplifies that signature and is perhaps their best film yet. They are currently working on a reboot of John Carpenter’s Escape From New York.

We thought we would go through the list of projects they have directed and rank them from high to low. None of the movies and shorts on this list are bad, they all have their merits. These rankings from top to bottom are just ones we felt showcased their talents the best.

We didn’t include movies they produced but didn’t direct.

#1. Abigail

An update to the second film on this list, Abagail is the natural progression of Radio Silence’s love of lockdown horror. It follows in pretty much the same footsteps of Ready or Not, but manages to go one better — make it about vampires.

Abigail

#2. Ready or Not

This film put Radio Silence on the map. While not as successful at the box office as some of their other films, Ready or Not proved that the team could step outside their limited anthology space and create a fun, thrilling, and bloody adventure-length film.

Ready or Not

#3. Scream (2022)

While Scream will always be a polarizing franchise, this prequel, sequel, reboot — however you want to label it showed just how much Radio Silence knew the source material. It wasn’t lazy or cash-grabby, just a good time with legendary characters we love and new ones who grew on us.

Scream (2022)

#4 Southbound (The Way Out)

Radio Silence tosses their found footage modus operandi for this anthology film. Responsible for the bookend stories, they create a terrifying world in their segment titled The Way Out, which involves strange floating beings and some sort of time loop. It’s kind of the first time we see their work without a shaky cam. If we were to rank this entire film, it would remain at this position on the list.

Southbound

#5. V/H/S (10/31/98)

The film that started it all for Radio Silence. Or should we say the segment that started it all. Even though this isn’t feature-length what they managed to do with the time they had was very good. Their chapter was titled 10/31/98, a found-footage short involving a group of friends who crash what they think is a staged exorcism only to learn not to assume things on Halloween night.

V/H/S

#6. Scream VI

Cranking up the action, moving to the big city and letting Ghostface use a shotgun, Scream VI turned the franchise on its head. Like their first one, this film played with canon and managed to win over a lot of fans in its direction, but alienated others for coloring too far outside the lines of Wes Craven’s beloved series. If any sequel was showing how the trope was going stale it was Scream VI, but it managed to squeeze some fresh blood out of this nearly three-decade mainstay.

Scream VI

#7. Devil’s Due

Fairly underrated, this, Radio Silence’s first feature-length film, is a sampler of things they took from V/H/S. It was filmed in an omnipresent found footage style, showcasing a form of possession, and features clueless men. Since this was their first bonafide major studio job it’s a wonderful touchstone to see how far they have come with their storytelling.

Devil’s Due

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