News
Etiquette! At the Theater (A Brief Guide to Not Being THAT GUY)
There’s nothing better than a horror movie in the theater. The surround sound, the giant screen and comfy chairs. The movie is building up to a scare and the whole theater can feel it. The tension is mounting, the killer is ready to make his move when-
“Sorry, excuse me, excuse me, just gonna squeeze past you.”
Are you goddamn kidding me?! The moment comes crashing down faster than a hatchet through a skullcap.
Want to make sure you never do this to any of your fellow innocent movie goers? Read on and learn some handy dandy movie theater etiquette.
Know When to Pick an Aisle Seat
Do you know you get up to use the bathroom a lot? Will you be frequenting the concession stand? Did you bring small children to the new Halloween movie (if so please see my next point)? Are you late to the movie?
If any of these apply to you, please sit close to the aisle. No one likes having to get up a bunch of times or having you awkwardly shuffle your ass in front of their face as you come and go. It’s distracting and uncomfortable for everyone involved.
Don’t Bring Your Children to a Scary Movie
I mean, this should go without saying, right? I get that babysitters are expensive and you think they won’t know what’s going on anyway and you really want to see the movie, but come on.
Movies are an increasingly expensive night out and I don’t want to hear your child start crying if the movie is too scary, or giggling at a scary movie sex scene. Also, scary movies probably aren’t the best thing for your kid to be watching. Unless you want them writing for iHorror when they grow up.
Shut the Hell Up
Gasps, exclamations, and screams are all welcome at scary movies. But talking to the characters on screen and whispering to your friends are party fouls. If I hear you yell “He’s behind you!”, guess what. I’ll be behind you. Dumping my soda over your head.
Yes, I Can See You Texting
Don’t be that guy. Even if you dim the brightness on your screen, I can still see you and so can everyone else. If someone texts you and you can’t stop wondering what it could be, duck down and give it a quick glance under your jacket to ease your mind.
Emergency? Leave. No? Don’t engage in a conversation. Pretty simple. And save the Facebook check in for after the film.
Keep the PDA to a Minumum
Hand holding and cuddling at a scary movie is one of life’s simple pleasures. But for the love of God no one wants to hear you sucking face. That’s not the kind of fear and disgust we’re looking for at the movies.
Leave Only Footprints
Did you enjoy your large popcorn, nachos and soda? Great! Show your appreciation by throwing your empties in the trash instead of leaving them for your fellow movie goers to kick over and trip on as they leave the aisle. The poor kid sweeping up the theater is going to be there long enough sweeping all those kernels you dropped by accident, don’t add more on top of it.
If you can abide by these basic rules of movie theater etiquette, congratulations! You’re a pillar of movie morals. Please feel free to see a movie in the same theater as me any time. If you can’t abide by these rules, I hear our local libraries have DVDs.
What’s your worst experience with someone breaking the unwritten rules of the movie theater? Let us know in the comments and remember, don’t be that guy!
Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'
Movies
Another Creepy Spider Movie Hits Shudder This Month
Good spider films are a theme this year. First, we had Sting and then there was Infested. The former is still in theaters and the latter is coming to Shudder starting April 26.
Infested has been getting some good reviews. People are saying that it’s not only a great creature feature but also a social commentary on racism in France.
According to IMDb: Writer/director Sébastien Vanicek was looking for ideas around the discrimination faced by black and Arab-looking people in France, and that led him to spiders, which are rarely welcome in homes; whenever they’re spotted, they’re swatted. As everyone in the story (people and spiders) is treated like vermin by society, the title came to him naturally.
Shudder has become the gold standard for streaming horror content. Since 2016, the service has been offering fans an expansive library of genre movies. in 2017, they began to stream exclusive content.
Since then Shudder has become a powerhouse in the film festival circuit, buying distribution rights to movies, or just producing some of their own. Just like Netflix, they give a film a short theatrical run before adding it to their library exclusively for subscribers.
Late Night With the Devil is a great example. It was released theatrically on March 22 and will begin streaming on the platform starting April 19.
While not getting the same buzz as Late Night, Infested is a festival favorite and many have said if you suffer from arachnophobia, you might want to take heed before watching it.
According to the synopsis, our main character, Kalib is turning 30 and dealing with some family issues. “He’s fighting with his sister over an inheritance and has cut ties with his best friend. Fascinated by exotic animals, he finds a venomous spider in a shop and brings it back to his apartment. It only takes a moment for the spider to escape and reproduce, turning the whole building into a dreadful web trap. The only option for Kaleb and his friends is to find a way out and survive.”
The film will be available to watch on Shudder starting April 26.
Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'
Movies
Part Concert, Part Horror Movie M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Trap’ Trailer Released
In true Shyamalan form, he sets his film Trap inside a social situation where we aren’t sure what is going on. Hopefully, there is a twist at the end. Furthermore, we hope it’s better than the one in his divisive 2021 movie Old.
The trailer seemingly gives away a lot, but, as in the past, you can’t rely on his trailers because they are often red herrings and you are being gaslit to think a certain way. For instance, his movie Knock at the Cabin was completely different than what the trailer implied and if you hadn’t read the book on which the film is based it was still like going in blind.
The plot for Trap is being dubbed an “experience” and we aren’t quite sure what that means. If we were to guess based on the trailer, it’s a concert movie wrapped around a horror mystery. There are original songs performed by Saleka, who plays Lady Raven, a kind of Taylor Swift/Lady Gaga hybrid. They have even set up a Lady Raven website to further the illusion.
Here is the fresh trailer:
According to the synopsis, a father takes his daughter to one of Lady Raven’s jam-packed concerts, “where they realize they’re at the center of a dark and sinister event.”
Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Trap stars Josh Hartnett, Ariel Donoghue, Saleka Shyamalan, Hayley Mills and Allison Pill. The film is produced by Ashwin Rajan, Marc Bienstock and M. Night Shyamalan. The executive producer is Steven Schneider.
Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'
News
Woman Brings Corpse Into Bank To Sign Loan Papers
Warning: This is a disturbing story.
You have to be pretty desperate for money to do what this Brazilian woman did at the bank to get a loan. She wheeled in a fresh corpse to endorse the contract and she seemingly thought the bank employees wouldn’t notice. They did.
This weird and disturbing story comes via ScreenGeek an entertainment digital publication. They write that a woman identified as Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes pushed a man she identified as her uncle into the bank pleading with him to sign loan papers for $3,400.
If you’re squeamish or easily triggered, be aware that the video captured of the situation is disturbing.
Latin America’s largest commercial network, TV Globo, reported on the crime, and according to ScreenGeek this is what Nunes says in Portuguese during the attempted transaction.
“Uncle, are you paying attention? You must sign [the loan contract]. If you don’t sign, there’s no way, as I cannot sign on your behalf!”
She then adds: “Sign so you can spare me further headaches; I can’t bear it any longer.”
At first we thought this might be a hoax, but according to Brazilian police, the uncle, 68-year-old Paulo Roberto Braga had passed away earlier that day.
“She attempted to feign his signature for the loan. He entered the bank already deceased,” Police Chief Fábio Luiz said in an interview with TV Globo. “Our priority is to continue investigating to identify other family members and gather more information regarding this loan.”
If convicted Nunes could be facing jail time on charges of fraud, embezzlement, and desecration of a corpse.
Listen to the 'Eye On Horror Podcast'
-
Trailers7 days ago
Watch the trailer for ‘Under Paris,’ the movie people are calling ‘French Jaws’ [Trailer]
-
News3 days ago
This Horror Film Just Derailed a Record Held by ‘Train to Busan’
-
Movies7 days ago
Ernie Hudson To Star In ‘Oswald: Down The Rabbit Hole’
-
News7 days ago
Paramount and Miramax Team Up to Reboot the “Scary Movie” Franchise
-
Movies3 days ago
Watch ‘Immaculate’ At Home Right Now
-
News4 days ago
Read Reviews For ‘Abigail’ The Latest From Radio Silence
-
Editorial5 days ago
Rob Zombie’s Directorial Debut Was Almost ‘The Crow 3’
-
News4 days ago
Melissa Barrera Says Her ‘Scream’ Contract Never Included a Third Movie
You must be logged in to post a comment Login