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‘Destroy All Humans’ Returns With Shot of Nostalgia and Polished Gameplay

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Destroy

Destroy all Humans is back, you guys. Crypto has returned with re-mastered and shiny new graphics. Best of all, he is just as pissed off at humans as you remember him. Black Forest Games has come out to bring some re-polished human disdain to Pandemic Studio’s 2005 Destroy All Humans.

Destroy All Humans is filled from top to bottom with a pulpy, atomic age B-movie vibe. From the sound effects to the Theremin music, this is undoubtedly channeling a specific feel of the 50’s sci-fi flick.

You play as Cryptosporidium-137, he is an alien from the planet of Furon. A planet that has lost its ability to reproduce due to their advanced weaponry and the side effects of using said weapons. The Furon’s have resulted to cloning as a way to continue their species, however each copy that is made is slowly diluting their powers.

All hope isn’t lost though, it turns out that on their previous travels, the Furon’s made a stop on earth at some point, and the Furon’s somehow ended up getting busy with humans. This lead to all humans having remnants of Furon DNA in within their species. A pure source of Furon energy.

So, the Furons take a road trip to Earth, only trouble is the first little guy they sent in, Crypto-136 disappeared on the little blue planet. So, in goes Crypt-137 to locate his fallen comrade, and begin the invasion to harvest the remnants of Furon energy contained in these human blood bags.

“Crypto and his maniacal

shenanigans are all in good fun.”

Crypto sounds a bit like Jack Nicholson here. Now this is a bit of a dated reference. I’m sure that only about 3 of you will know what the hell I’m talking about but, I believe that Crypto’s Nicholson voice is in homage to 1990’s Spaced Invaders. In that film one of the aliens that crashes on Earth sounds identical to Nicholson. That’s just a tiny bit of trivia for you. If you haven’t seen Spaced Invaders, you should give it a shot, it’s pretty fun B-movie goodness.

That isn’t the only voice that is worth a mention. The Furon boss, POX is played by Richard Horvitz. That’s right Invader Zim himself. He doesn’t change his voice practically at all, and he sounds just as frustrated here as he does as Zim. Again, he wants to destroy all humans. Sound familiar? You get the point.

Destroy

All the original dialogue from the 2005’s Destroy All Humans is just as it was. This means that none of the humor from back then has changed either. So, as you can expect some of it is a little rough around the edges and stuff that might cause modern day cancel culture to hit the triggered button. But, look at times it’s pretty damned funny, I think we can give little Crypto a pass.

Crypto comes to the party with a Chain lightning gun, a plasma blaster and a sort of grenade launcher. These weapons can all be upgraded between missions in order to mod their functionality. There is also an anal probe weapon that causes the poor victims head to explode after being deeply prodded. Sadly, the probe doesn’t work very well within combat.

For most of the game you are running around these open sandboxes, but in some cases you can jump into your flying saucer to unleash death from above with your trusty death ray.

Destroy

These are all in the name of destroying all humans. Crypto comes with his own set of Furon powers as well. He comes loaded with his famous telekinesis power that allows Crypto to fling cows around or send humans flying into the clouds before plummeting down to Earth to smash into concrete. You can also, brainwash targets or get them to dance as a distraction. Most notably and the mechanic you will use the most is the ability to camouflage as a human. This allows you to enter restricted areas and gets you close to individuals that you might need to take out.

All these levels are exactly the ones you may remember from 2005’s Destroy All Humans. But, for the eagle-eyed knit=pickers you might notice there is a level in which you sabotage a UFO at a military instillation that is an all new level and didn’t appear at any point in previous titles.

The graphics look really good here. The bright color palette is really fun and adds to the cartoonish chaos that makes up the entirety of this game.  Everything from the cut scenes to the gameplay has been re-mastered and it looks like Black Forest Games took its time to make everything look really good, and nicely polished.

Traversing feels really good. Crypto has a makeshift hover board that he uses to skate around and has some cool rocket pack capabilities that offer him flight and hover abilities. These feel really smooth and add to that fluidity of carefree gameplay that makes up a ton of this game.

That fluidity is especially fun once you get all your powers going a the same time. Use mind powers to make an enemy fight alongside you, toss folks around with telekinesis, chain lightning some baddies and then anal probe the last bit of them to get in some laughs. It’s fun to see how many ways you can get into these big brawls.

Now, the downside is that a lot of this become redundant and repetitive at times. Doing the same thing over and over, after you level up your weapons all the way, leaves something to be wanted. The lack of enemy variety starts to wear on you too.

There has been enough time between me playing the game back in 2005 till now. It feel like a totally new game at this point because I don’t remember story details from that long ago by any means. The only thing that feels a dated is some crude humor, but that was something that South Park and Beavis and Butt-head loving kids really dug about the series. So, in retrospect you have to take the good with the bad.

Destroy

Now, I will say that it was hard for me to kill these poor moo cows back in 2005 and it’s just as hard to kill them now. Oddly enough, the game doesn’t give you an option in killing them or not killing them. The training mission immediately tasks you with hurting the poor cows with your telekinesis. I never felt good about it. I would much rather be killing some of the xenophobes and racists that make up some parts of the town.

The game offers a fair amount of re-playability by way of its time trail challenges. Completionists will want to get the highest star rating on each of these challenges. These are probably the toughest part of the game, but well worth those achievement points to add onto the gamer score.

Destory All Humans is a fun 15-hour blasty, blasty of an experience. It is fun to destroy the dumb, racist, war mongers in the game people in the game. Crypto and his maniacal shenanigans are all in good fun. Part nostalgia and part great destroyer, this game ends up being well worth its money ($39.99) and a great way to have a few laughs while destroying a heck load of humans. If you are a fan of the series and are doing this to scratch that nostalgia itch, then you are going to have a good time and get what you expected. If you are new to this and don’t have that past connection with it, this could be hit or miss for you.

Destroy All Humans is out now on PS4, Xbox One, Stadi and Windows. You can pick up a copy right HERE.

Want to flashback to the 50’s and alien B-movies from the time? Click here.

 

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Thrills and Chills: Ranking ‘Radio Silence’ Films from Bloody Brilliant to Just Bloody

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Radio Silence Films

Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett, and Chad Villella are all filmmakers under the collective label called Radio Silence. Bettinelli-Olpin and Gillett are the primary directors under that moniker while Villella produces.

They have gained popularity over the past 13 years and their films have become known as having a certain Radio Silence “signature.” They are bloody, usually contain monsters, and have breakneck action sequences. Their recent film Abigail exemplifies that signature and is perhaps their best film yet. They are currently working on a reboot of John Carpenter’s Escape From New York.

We thought we would go through the list of projects they have directed and rank them from high to low. None of the movies and shorts on this list are bad, they all have their merits. These rankings from top to bottom are just ones we felt showcased their talents the best.

We didn’t include movies they produced but didn’t direct.

#1. Abigail

An update to the second film on this list, Abagail is the natural progression of Radio Silence’s love of lockdown horror. It follows in pretty much the same footsteps of Ready or Not, but manages to go one better — make it about vampires.

Abigail

#2. Ready or Not

This film put Radio Silence on the map. While not as successful at the box office as some of their other films, Ready or Not proved that the team could step outside their limited anthology space and create a fun, thrilling, and bloody adventure-length film.

Ready or Not

#3. Scream (2022)

While Scream will always be a polarizing franchise, this prequel, sequel, reboot — however you want to label it showed just how much Radio Silence knew the source material. It wasn’t lazy or cash-grabby, just a good time with legendary characters we love and new ones who grew on us.

Scream (2022)

#4 Southbound (The Way Out)

Radio Silence tosses their found footage modus operandi for this anthology film. Responsible for the bookend stories, they create a terrifying world in their segment titled The Way Out, which involves strange floating beings and some sort of time loop. It’s kind of the first time we see their work without a shaky cam. If we were to rank this entire film, it would remain at this position on the list.

Southbound

#5. V/H/S (10/31/98)

The film that started it all for Radio Silence. Or should we say the segment that started it all. Even though this isn’t feature-length what they managed to do with the time they had was very good. Their chapter was titled 10/31/98, a found-footage short involving a group of friends who crash what they think is a staged exorcism only to learn not to assume things on Halloween night.

V/H/S

#6. Scream VI

Cranking up the action, moving to the big city and letting Ghostface use a shotgun, Scream VI turned the franchise on its head. Like their first one, this film played with canon and managed to win over a lot of fans in its direction, but alienated others for coloring too far outside the lines of Wes Craven’s beloved series. If any sequel was showing how the trope was going stale it was Scream VI, but it managed to squeeze some fresh blood out of this nearly three-decade mainstay.

Scream VI

#7. Devil’s Due

Fairly underrated, this, Radio Silence’s first feature-length film, is a sampler of things they took from V/H/S. It was filmed in an omnipresent found footage style, showcasing a form of possession, and features clueless men. Since this was their first bonafide major studio job it’s a wonderful touchstone to see how far they have come with their storytelling.

Devil’s Due

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Perhaps the Scariest, Most Disturbing Series of The Year

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You may have never heard of Richard Gadd, but that will probably change after this month. His mini-series Baby Reindeer just hit Netflix and it’s a terrifying deep dive into abuse, addiction, and mental illness. What is even scarier is that it’s based on Gadd’s real-life hardships.

The crux of the story is about a man named Donny Dunn played by Gadd who wants to be a stand-up comedian, but it’s not working out so well thanks to stage fright stemming from his insecurity.

One day at his day job he meets a woman named Martha, played to unhinged perfection by Jessica Gunning, who is instantly charmed by Donny’s kindness and good looks. It doesn’t take long before she nicknames him “Baby Reindeer” and begins to relentlessly stalk him. But that is just the apex of Donny’s problems, he has his own incredibly disturbing issues.

This mini-series should come with a lot of triggers, so just be warned it is not for the faint of heart. The horrors here don’t come from blood and gore, but from physical and mental abuse that go beyond any physiological thriller you may have ever seen.

“It’s very emotionally true, obviously: I was severely stalked and severely abused,” Gadd said to People, explaining why he changed some aspects of the story. “But we wanted it to exist in the sphere of art, as well as protect the people it’s based on.”

The series has gained momentum thanks to positive word-of-mouth, and Gadd is getting used to the notoriety.

“It’s clearly struck a chord,” he told The Guardian. “I really did believe in it, but it’s taken off so quickly that I do feel a bit windswept.”

You can stream Baby Reindeer on Netflix right now.

If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, please contact the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) or go to rainn.org.

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The Original ‘Beetlejuice’ Sequel Had an Interesting Location

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beetlejuice in Hawaii Movie

Back in the late ’80s and early ’90s sequels to hit movies weren’t as linear as they are today. It was more like “let’s re-do the situation but in a different location.” Remember Speed 2, or National Lampoon’s European Vacation? Even Aliens, as good as it is, follows a lot of the plot points of the original; people stuck on a ship, an android, a little girl in peril instead of a cat. So it makes sense that one of the most popular supernatural comedies of all time, Beetlejuice would follow the same pattern.

In 1991 Tim Burton was interested in doing a sequel to his 1988 original, it was called Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian:

“The Deetz family moves to Hawaii to develop a resort. Construction begins, and it’s quickly discovered that the hotel will be sitting on top of an ancient burial ground. Beetlejuice comes in to save the day.”

Burton liked the script but wanted some re-writes so he asked then-hot screenwriter Daniel Waters who had just got done contributing to Heathers. He passed on the opportunity so producer David Geffen offered it to Troop Beverly Hills scribe Pamela Norris to no avail.

Eventually, Warner Bros. asked Kevin Smith to punch up Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian, he scoffed at the idea, saying, “Didn’t we say all we needed to say in the first Beetlejuice? Must we go tropical?”

Nine years later the sequel was killed. The studio said Winona Ryder was now too old for the part and an entire re-cast needed to happen. But Burton never gave up, there were a lot of directions he wanted to take his characters, including a Disney crossover.

“We talked about lots of different things,” the director said in Entertainment Weekly. “That was early on when we were going, Beetlejuice and the Haunted MansionBeetlejuice Goes West, whatever. Lots of things came up.”

Fast-forward to 2011 when another script was pitched for a sequel. This time the writer of Burton’s Dark Shadows,  Seth Grahame-Smith was hired and he wanted to make sure the story wasn’t a cash-grabbing remake or reboot. Four years later, in 2015, a script was approved with both Ryder and Keaton saying they would return to their respective roles. In 2017 that script was revamped and then eventually shelved in 2019.

During the time the sequel script was being tossed around in Hollywood, in 2016 an artist named Alex Murillo posted what looked like one-sheets for a Beetlejuice sequel. Although they were fabricated and had no affiliation with Warner Bros. people thought they were real.

Perhaps the virality of the artwork sparked interest in a Beetlejuice sequel once again, and finally, it was confirmed in 2022 Beetlejuice 2 had a green light from a script written by Wednesday writers  Alfred Gough and Miles Millar. The star of that series Jenna Ortega signed on to the new movie with filming starting in 2023. It was also confirmed that Danny Elfman would return to do the score.

Burton and Keaton agreed that the new film titled Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice wouldn’t rely on CGI or other other forms of technology. They wanted the film to feel “handmade.” The film wrapped in November 2023.

It’s been over three decades to come up with a sequel to Beetlejuice. Hopefully, since they said aloha to Beetlejuice Goes Hawaiian there has been enough time and creativity to ensure Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice will not only honor the characters, but fans of the original.

Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice will open theatrically on September 6.

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