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The 10 Most WTF Moments from Horror-Comedy “Detention”

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detention riley and claptonIf the acronym WTF manifested itself into a movie, it might look something like the 2011 horror-comedy Detention, starring Josh Hutcherson. Detention is the story of a killer mimicking the one from a popular movie-within-the-movie called Cinderhella as he or she terrorizes the students of a small-town high school. Sounds normal enough, eh? Just peruse these 10 WTF moments and you’ll understand (mild SPOILERS ahead).

10. The first character we see identifies herself as a BITCH. Not bitch in a derogatory sense, but BITCH meaning Beauty, Intelligence, Talent, Charisma, and Hoobastank. Yes, the band. She is promptly murdered.

9. Our heroine, Riley, hates the world and is down on her luck. See? detention riley bad luckOn her way to school one morning, she is casually robbed of her iPod in broad daylight by a knife-wielding hipster in a Sigur Ros T-shirt (which he stole, of course). They exchange words, and Riley continues on her way minus her iPod shuffle, as if this kind of laid back thievery were an everyday occurrence.

8. The killer wears a tiara. Need I say more?

7. In the movie-within-the-movie, Cinderhella II, the killer has set up a Saw-like trap wherein a prom queen must dig a shoe out of her abdomen. Her biggest protest during this? She worked so hard in pilates to get her stomach toned, and her muscles are too tight to allow for adequate stabbing/digging. detention cinderhella

6. In science class, students are actually tasked with building a time machine. For real—the teacher has asked the students to legitimately build a machine that travels through time, and their grades depend on it.

5. Over the years, killers in horror movies have had to improvise or get a bit clever when it comes to the weapons they use to dispatch their victims. This one has decided to use a ceiling fan, because why not? detention ceiling fan

4. When you wish upon a star, your mother gets abducted by aliens.

3. Ash’s chainsaw hand in Army of Darkness is legendary in the horror genre. Not so legendary is the kid who needed to wear a TV set on his hand to hide a strange deformity. “TV Hand! TV Hand! TV Hand,” his classmates taunted.  Kids can be so cruel. detention tv hand

2. A football player becomes choked up during a game and vomits on a teammate. Oh, and his vomit is made of acid. And it dissolves his teammate’s helmet.

1. Throughout the film there are title screens that act like chapter names or descriptions for characters’ back stories. One such title featured a combination of words I never thought I’d see in my life: The Disturbing Abduction of the Time-Traveling Bear. Allow the following picture to give you a visual: detention bear abduction

For these and many, many more WTF moments, sign in for Detention, now available to stream on Netflix. Watch the trailer below to whet your appetite.

[youtube id=”G4PFz9gIKKM” align=”center” mode=”normal” autoplay=”no”]

 

 

 

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Another Creepy Spider Movie Hits Shudder This Month

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Good spider films are a theme this year. First, we had Sting and then there was Infested. The former is still in theaters and the latter is coming to Shudder starting April 26.

Infested has been getting some good reviews. People are saying that it’s not only a great creature feature but also a social commentary on racism in France.

According to IMDb: Writer/director Sébastien Vanicek was looking for ideas around the discrimination faced by black and Arab-looking people in France, and that led him to spiders, which are rarely welcome in homes; whenever they’re spotted, they’re swatted. As everyone in the story (people and spiders) is treated like vermin by society, the title came to him naturally.

Shudder has become the gold standard for streaming horror content. Since 2016, the service has been offering fans an expansive library of genre movies. in 2017, they began to stream exclusive content.

Since then Shudder has become a powerhouse in the film festival circuit, buying distribution rights to movies, or just producing some of their own. Just like Netflix, they give a film a short theatrical run before adding it to their library exclusively for subscribers.

Late Night With the Devil is a great example. It was released theatrically on March 22 and will begin streaming on the platform starting April 19.

While not getting the same buzz as Late Night, Infested is a festival favorite and many have said if you suffer from arachnophobia, you might want to take heed before watching it.

Infested

According to the synopsis, our main character, Kalib is turning 30 and dealing with some family issues. “He’s fighting with his sister over an inheritance and has cut ties with his best friend. Fascinated by exotic animals, he finds a venomous spider in a shop and brings it back to his apartment. It only takes a moment for the spider to escape and reproduce, turning the whole building into a dreadful web trap. The only option for Kaleb and his friends is to find a way out and survive.”

The film will be available to watch on Shudder starting April 26.

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Part Concert, Part Horror Movie M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Trap’ Trailer Released

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In true Shyamalan form, he sets his film Trap inside a social situation where we aren’t sure what is going on. Hopefully, there is a twist at the end. Furthermore, we hope it’s better than the one in his divisive 2021 movie Old.

The trailer seemingly gives away a lot, but, as in the past, you can’t rely on his trailers because they are often red herrings and you are being gaslit to think a certain way. For instance, his movie Knock at the Cabin was completely different than what the trailer implied and if you hadn’t read the book on which the film is based it was still like going in blind.

The plot for Trap is being dubbed an “experience” and we aren’t quite sure what that means. If we were to guess based on the trailer, it’s a concert movie wrapped around a horror mystery. There are original songs performed by Saleka, who plays Lady Raven, a kind of Taylor Swift/Lady Gaga hybrid. They have even set up a Lady Raven website to further the illusion.

Here is the fresh trailer:

According to the synopsis, a father takes his daughter to one of Lady Raven’s jam-packed concerts, “where they realize they’re at the center of a dark and sinister event.”

Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Trap stars Josh Hartnett, Ariel Donoghue, Saleka Shyamalan, Hayley Mills and Allison Pill. The film is produced by Ashwin Rajan, Marc Bienstock and M. Night Shyamalan. The executive producer is Steven Schneider.

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Woman Brings Corpse Into Bank To Sign Loan Papers

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Warning: This is a disturbing story.

You have to be pretty desperate for money to do what this Brazilian woman did at the bank to get a loan. She wheeled in a fresh corpse to endorse the contract and she seemingly thought the bank employees wouldn’t notice. They did.

This weird and disturbing story comes via ScreenGeek an entertainment digital publication. They write that a woman identified as Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes pushed a man she identified as her uncle into the bank pleading with him to sign loan papers for $3,400. 

If you’re squeamish or easily triggered, be aware that the video captured of the situation is disturbing. 

Latin America’s largest commercial network, TV Globo, reported on the crime, and according to ScreenGeek this is what Nunes says in Portuguese during the attempted transaction. 

“Uncle, are you paying attention? You must sign [the loan contract]. If you don’t sign, there’s no way, as I cannot sign on your behalf!”

She then adds: “Sign so you can spare me further headaches; I can’t bear it any longer.” 

At first we thought this might be a hoax, but according to Brazilian police, the uncle, 68-year-old Paulo Roberto Braga had passed away earlier that day.

 “She attempted to feign his signature for the loan. He entered the bank already deceased,” Police Chief Fábio Luiz said in an interview with TV Globo. “Our priority is to continue investigating to identify other family members and gather more information regarding this loan.”

If convicted Nunes could be facing jail time on charges of fraud, embezzlement, and desecration of a corpse.

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