American Horror Story: Fearful Pranks Ensue

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The Halloween episodes of American Horror Story are always my favorite, Not just because they premiere just before my favorite day of the year, but because they always take full advantage of the holiday and make some of the best episodes. If you only watch one episode of American Horror Story I suggest going with the Halloween episode; although there’s always two parts to the hallow episodes so expect to be dragged into the orgasmic horror.

CAUTION SPOILERS AHEAD!

So this seasons Halloween episode gave us about the best zombie attack I’ve ever seen. I love watching peoples intestines being pulled out while blood is pouring out of their mouth and watching assholes limbs be pulled off in every direction. Now I know what you’re thinking, “I thought this season was about witches? Where did the zombies come from?” Well, Miss Marie summoned the dead my friends. She summoned the dead to kill some nasty white folk that killed one of her hair dressers innocent sons riding his bike on the way home from school. The mother was just talking about how she thinks that the times are changing and her son will be fine at the integrated school.  I really hope witches are real so something like this could have happened to the nonfictional characters that did the same thing in our nonfictional world.

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We then go back to the school where we see Spalding’s room for the first times (and his nails…YIKES). Spalding has a lot of dolls to play with. I guess silent people need silent friends. He hears that Fiona is home and travels down the stairs, which then brings us back to where the last episode left off, with Madison’s dead body laying on the floor (we get to watch the murder again, of course). Well Fiona is trying to converse with Spalding; to appease her evil act she just committed, I suppose. We then hear a crash outside. QUEENIE! Fiona finds Queenie lying in a bloody mess and we see the bull man pop up behind her. I’m sad because we didn’t get to see the beheading of the bull! Yes, Fiona decapitates Mister Bull Man. We find this out when Marie gets a package at her salon in the next scene. She obviously does not like seeing her lovers head missing from his body. This is how the war between the magic will begin.

We get just a short glimpse of our Frankenstein Kyle in this episode. He comes in still covered in his mothers blood. We learn that he can talk! He says his name. Lily decides that she can’t deal with the monster she created and decides she wants to rat poison him. If only she knew that she has her monsters confused. Good thing when she comes back with Kyle’s food, he’s escaped. Good boy Kyle.

*Did you all notice the skeleton man costume of Tate’s from Season 1 drive by in the car when Lily runs outside to look for Kyle?

Now let’s talk about Hank, Delia’s husband. WHAT A JERK! He is out of town in this episode. He tells Cordelia it is for work, but we know the truth. Cordelia, sorry, but you are married to a psychopath. I guess he would probably like me to call him a monster. He says he was a monster for Halloween last year right after his lover says she thinks Halloween allows people to be who they really want to be. Well, he kills her during their after sex meal and she admits she likes him a lot. So does Hank kill every Halloween or is this his first time?

When the council shows up, we get a nice glimpse into the past. We learn that Miss Myrtle Snow (the head of the council I assume) and Fiona have a long history of disliking each other. Those two always have a hateful relationship. Myrtle knew that Fiona killed Analee. She even cast a spell on Spalding’s tongue in hopes of his confession. Silly girl, you should never admit a plan like that to anyone until after the fact. She tells one of the other girls at the school about her tongue spell and Spalding over hears. He of course slices off his own tongue to protect the love of his life, Fiona. That was surprising to me, I guess I get love and hate confused sometimes.

So with the end of the episode we are left with learning that Madison’s cold dead body is Spalding’s newest doll, Cordelia getting some kind of acid thrown in her face, and ZOMBIES CRAWLING EVERYWHERE outside of the school. The war has begun.

 

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