Connect with us

News

Just Kill Me: 5 Movies You Wouldn’t Want to Survive

Published

on

survive

You may be able to tough it out with the best of the Final Girls, but would you want to survive a bloody massacre just to live with the Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder?

If you survive a bout with Freddy Krueger, every time you go to sleep you’ll just be waiting for the next round. If you can beat Jason, you may never again feel like you’re practicing safe sex. After Leatherface, you could never take the scenic route.

If I were in any one of these 5 movie situations, I think I’d rather just say no thank you, just kill me. Take me now and take me quick, because I sure as shit wouldn’t want to try and fight my way through.

Asylum Blackout (aka The Incident, 2011)

In Asylum Blackout, a massive storm causes a power outage at an asylum for the criminally insane. This unlocks all the mechanical doors (great idea, guys), trapping a small group of civilian cooks with the disturbed inmates who have stopped taking their medication. Things aren’t looking good for the guys when their only safe haven is breached and they must attempt to make their way through the asylum to find outside help. Written by S. Craig Zahler (Bone Tomahawk), the situation is perfectly terrifying. Our heroes must navigate dark, winding corridors through half-empty cell blocks while trying to avoid sadistic criminals who are only focused on causing pain. No thank you.

The Descent (2005)

Claustrophobia is bad enough, but being trapped in the deep, dark underground with an unknown number of insidious cave-dwellers and a group of your best friends with no help in sight is just too much. Those creatures could be lurking around every dark corner, and you’re hopelessly lost in an unknown tunnel system. Who knows if there even is a way out. If you even do manage to escape, you have to live with the guilt of knowing that you’ve left your friends down there to be eaten. You’d certainly never feel comfortable in the world knowing that those things exist down there. And that’s if you actually manage to find freedom.

Tusk (2014)

Being surgically transformed into a human-walrus hybrid is bad enough, but being forced to live that way is just unfathomable. Why would you ever want to survive that? No, God, no, why. That’s it, just kill me.

The Human Centipede (2009)

Speaking of horrible surgical situations that you wouldn’t want to survive, Human Centipede, amiright? Nope nope nope. I don’t think I need to go into my reasoning here, because it’s just a huge pile of hell no.

The Mist (2007)

If the tentacle monsters, acid-shooting giant spiders, and flying death bugs don’t convince you, maybe the maniacal religious fanatics will. You sure as hell wouldn’t want to be forced out into the great and misty unknown with those creatures around, but those bible thumpers might just stab you and toss you out anyways. If you do make it through, the future is bleak. Would those inter-dimensional hell beasts come back? Who knows. Have you witnessed the brutal deaths of all your friends and family? Sure thing. Would you live in constant terror with the knowledge of everything you’ve witnessed? Most definitely.

 

So, what would be on your list? What situation would make you shut down all hope? Tell us in the comments!

'Civil War' Review: Is It Worth Watching?

Click to comment

You must be logged in to post a comment Login

Leave a Reply

News

Watch ‘The Burning’ At The Location Where It Was Filmed

Published

on

Fangoria is reporting that fans of the 1981 slasher The Burning will be able to have a screening of the film at the location where it was filmed. The movie is set at Camp Blackfoot which is actually the Stonehaven Nature Preserve in Ransomville, New York.

This ticketed event will take place on August 3. Guests will be able to take a tour of the grounds as well as enjoy some campfire snacks along with the screening of The Burning.

The Burning

The film came out in the early ’80s when teen slashers were being churned out in magnum force. Thanks to Sean S. Cunningham’s Friday the 13th, filmmakers wanted to get in on the low-budget, high-profit movie market and a casket load of these types of films were produced, some better than others.

The Burning is one of the good ones, mostly because of the special effects from Tom Savini who had just come off of his groundbreaking work on Dawn of the Dead and Friday the 13th. He declined to do the sequel because of its illogical premise and instead signed on to do this movie. Also, a young Jason Alexander who would later go on to play George in Seinfeld is a featured player.

Because of its practical gore, The Burning had to be heavily edited before it received an R-rating. The MPAA was under the thumb of protest groups and political bigwigs to censor violent films at the time because slashers were just so graphic and detailed in their gore.

Tickets are $50, and if you want a special t-shirt, that will cost you another $25, You can get all the information by visiting the On Set Cinema webpage.

'Civil War' Review: Is It Worth Watching?

Continue Reading

Movies

‘Longlegs’ Creepy “Part 2” Teaser Appears on Instagram

Published

on

Longlegs

Neon Films released an Insta-teaser for their horror film Longlegs today. Titled Dirty: Part 2, the clip only furthers the mystery of what we are in for when this movie is finally released on July 12.

The official logline is: FBI Agent Lee Harker is assigned to an unsolved serial killer case that takes unexpected turns, revealing evidence of the occult. Harker discovers a personal connection to the killer and must stop him before he strikes again.

Directed by former actor Oz Perkins who also gave us The Blackcoat’s Daughter and Gretel & Hansel, Longlegs is already creating buzz with its moody images and cryptic hints. The film is rated R for bloody violence, and disturbing images.

Longlegs stars Nicolas Cage, Maika Monroe, and Alicia Witt.

'Civil War' Review: Is It Worth Watching?

Continue Reading

News

Exclusive Sneak Peek: Eli Roth and Crypt TV’s VR Series ‘The Faceless Lady’ Episode Five

Published

on

Eli Roth (Cabin Fever) and Crypt TV are knocking it out of the park with their new VR show, The Faceless Lady. For those unaware, this is the first fully scripted VR horror show on the market.

Even for masters of horror like Eli Roth and Crypt TV, this is a monumental undertaking. However, if I trust anyone to change the way that we experience horror, it would be these two legends.

The Faceless Lady

Ripped from the pages of Irish folklore, The Faceless Lady tells the story of a tragic spirit cursed to wander the halls of her castle for all of eternity. However, when three young couples are invited to the castle for a series of games, their fates may soon change.

So far, the story has provided horror fans with a gripping game of life or death that doesn’t look as if it will slow down in episode five. Luckily, we have an exclusive clip that may be able to satiate your appetites until the new premiere.

Airing on 4/25 at 5pmPT/8pmET, episode five follows our final three contestants in this wicked game. As the stakes are raised ever higher, will Ella be able to fully awaken her connection with Lady Margaret?

The faceless lady

The newest episode can be found on Meta Quest TV. If you haven’t already, follow this link to subscribe to the series. Make sure to check out the new clip below.

Eli Roth Present’s THE FACELESS LADY S1E5 Clip: THE DUEL – YouTube

To view in the highest resolution, adjust the quality settings in the bottom right corner of the clip.

'Civil War' Review: Is It Worth Watching?

Continue Reading