Unfriended: Dark Web
It looks like we're being pulled into the "Dark Web". 😱 This stuff is scary... if you don't cover your computer camera... you might after watching this! Unfriended Dark Web is out July 20th! 🖥👀 #Unfriended #DarkWeb #iHorror #UnfriendedDarkWebPosted by iHorror on Wednesday, July 11, 2018
I arrived at my Kevin Smith epiphany a little late compared to most people. It wasn’t with Clerks, or Mallrats or Chasing Amy but with Dogma. Being raised with a Catholic father, I understood the humor and it delighted me. From there, with each new movie I saw, I was truly a fan.
And then, one glorious day, I heard he was making a horror movie.
I was so excited. Not unlike Tarantino, Kevin Smith is in love with his own dialogue but UNLIKE Tarantino’s, I could listen to it all day. Would it have that same biting humor that Dogma had? Or maybe the silliness of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back? Red State was unlike anything I had ever seen from him.
To me, it was intense, wildly disturbing and well-made. In today’s society, it seemed almost plausible. The long dialogues were there and it hit its mark. I was impressed that Kevin Smith could make something so drastically different. Then I heard whispers about another horror movie.
Tusk was the mutated, terror baby between horror and comedy. Some people HATE this movie with the fire of a thousand suns and I’m not really sure why. I have never seen anything like it. Justin Long as a snarky A-hole of a podcaster going to interview an old sailor with an obsession with walruses in his creaky Northeastern mansion….sure, yeah, why not? I’m down.
Again, Kevin Smith doing his best Kevin Smith, the dialogue is on point. The performances are perfect for the movie and HOLY SHIT IT’S HALEY JOEL OSMENT! While the ending was overly goofy to some, to me it was devastatingly sad. While you really do hate the lead character, his fate is long and unforgiving. Truly this movie is one of a kind. BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!
Yoga Hosers, man. While it doesn’t have the thrills of Red State or the fun storytelling of Tusk, this was a trip set in the same universe as the latter film. Two Canadian lady-clerks (Kevin Smith’s daughter Harley Quinn Smith and Johnny Depp’s daughter Lily-Rose Depp) fight sausage Nazis, wait no…Nazi sausages. That’s the one. It sounds ridiculous and it is. It has a lot of people saying , “No, Kevin Smith, no.”
If you take this movie like a legit horror film of course you’re going to hate it. But if you look at it in the vein of Sharknado, then it’s a hoot and a half and you will really enjoy yourself. This is the second in the True North Trilogy and will be followed up by Moose Jaws.
Kevin Smith also had a Krampus horror film in the works called Comes the Krampus but when that fell through it was reworked to KillRoy Was Here. What’s my whole point in this long diatribe? Kevin Smith and horror movies belong together. MANY will disagree with me I know, but Kevin Smith did decades of biting wit and long-returning character comedies and it was time he explored his options.
He is wacky and goofy and can bring silliness and disturbing content and great storytelling. What other genre allows for the greatest range of creativity? Horror is the ultimate genre for creative minds because anything and everything is allowed. Keep at it, Kevin Smith. Never change.
(Featured image courtesy of UPI)