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Stuart Gordon & Jason Voorhees Teach Kids about “Stranger Danger”!

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Written by Dr. Jose

Who better to teach kids about “stranger danger” than the ultimate dangerous stranger himself, Jason Voorhees?

It’s funny to think about now, but back in the ’80s it was not all that uncommon for the brutal murderers of the big screen – who were dominating the box office at the time – to be repurposed for various other money-making outlets which were aimed at the youth of the day. Michael Myers was in a video game, Leatherface popped up in Daffy Duck movies, and Freddy Krueger – hell, when it came to kids, Freddy was more popular than the Easter Bunny (and about just as scary).

And that big ol’ water-logged mama’s boy, Jason Voorhees? He was no stranger to family friendly fare, either.

In 1988, the same year Friday the 13th VII: The New Blood came out, Triaminic (the company that makes cold medicine for kids) released a home video entitled Kid Safe: The Video. The 30-minute video, which was written and directed by body horror maestro Stuart Gordon and stars SCTV alums Andrea Martin and Joe Flaherty (acting as host, as his Count Floyd character), was intended to teach kids about what to do (and what not to do) in case they’re ever left home alone. Stuff like don’t drink your parents booze, don’t stick metal items in a toaster, and only call 911 in an emergency – y’know, the basics. Martin plays the little girl who’s left home alone, and throughout the video she breaks every single rule – only to immediately learn her lesson each time. By the end she’s completely reformed; an upstanding, rule-obeying kid who has learned to think before she acts. So when a stranger comes knocking at her door towards the end of the video, she smiles knowingly and proudly ignores it without a second thought.

So who was the stranger knocking at her door? Why, Jason Voorhees, of course! As the camera shows us the view from the front porch, we see Mr. Voorhees, who’s happens to be joined by a martian, a werewolf, a mummy, and a witch. Upon being denied entry, Jason shrugs and says, “Ah, well…”, and the crew saunters off to parts unknown.

The role of Jason was played by Daniel Welk – his only credit to date. And yes, that’s the late (and irreplaceable) Meshach Taylor playing the fireman. If anything, the video is a reminder of a bygone era when horror’s biggest icons were treated more like mascots than they were murderers.

So remember: if someone knocks at your door this Friday the 13th, be sure to ask who it is before you open it!

Thanks to Youtuber Taz D. for uploading and preserving this piece of weirdo video history.

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‘Evil Dead’ Film Franchise Getting TWO New Installments

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It was a risk for Fede Alvarez to reboot Sam Raimi’s horror classic The Evil Dead in 2013, but that risk paid off and so did its spiritual sequel Evil Dead Rise in 2023. Now Deadline is reporting that the series is getting, not one, but two fresh entries.

We already knew about the Sébastien Vaniček upcoming film that delves into the Deadite universe and should be a proper sequel to the latest film, but we are broadsided that Francis Galluppi and Ghost House Pictures are doing a one-off project set in Raimi’s universe based off of an idea that Galluppi pitched to Raimi himself. That concept is being kept under wraps.

Evil Dead Rise

“Francis Galluppi is a storyteller who knows when to keep us waiting in simmering tension and when to hit us with explosive violence,” Raimi told Deadline. “He is a director that shows uncommon control in his feature debut.”

That feature is titled The Last Stop In Yuma County which will release theatrically in the United States on May 4. It follows a traveling salesman, “stranded at a rural Arizona rest stop,” and “is thrust into a dire hostage situation by the arrival of two bank robbers with no qualms about using cruelty-or cold, hard steel-to protect their bloodstained fortune.”

Galluppi is an award-winning sci-fi/horror shorts director whose acclaimed works include High Desert Hell and The Gemini Project. You can view the full edit of High Desert Hell and the teaser for Gemini below:

High Desert Hell
The Gemini Project

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‘Invisible Man 2’ Is “Closer Than Its Ever Been” to Happening

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Elisabeth Moss in a very well-thought-out statement said in an interview for Happy Sad Confused that even though there have been some logistical issues for doing Invisible Man 2 there is hope on the horizon.

Podcast host Josh Horowitz asked about the follow-up and if Moss and director Leigh Whannell were any closer to cracking a solution to getting it made. “We are closer than we have ever been to cracking it,” said Moss with a huge grin. You can see her reaction at the 35:52 mark in the below video.

Happy Sad Confused

Whannell is currently in New Zealand filming another monster movie for Universal, Wolf Man, which might be the spark that ignites Universal’s troubled Dark Universe concept which hasn’t gained any momentum since Tom Cruise’s failed attempt at resurrecting The Mummy.

Also, in the podcast video, Moss says she is not in the Wolf Man film so any speculation that it’s a crossover project is left in the air.

Meanwhile, Universal Studios is in the middle of constructing a year-round haunt house in Las Vegas which will showcase some of their classic cinematic monsters. Depending on attendance, this could be the boost the studio needs to get audiences interested in their creature IPs once more and to get more films made based on them.

The Las Vegas project is set to open in 2025, coinciding with their new proper theme park in Orlando called Epic Universe.

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Jake Gyllenhaal’s Thriller ‘Presumed Innocent’ Series Gets Early Release Date

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Jake gyllenhaal presumed innocent

Jake Gyllenhaal’s limited series Presumed Innocent is dropping on AppleTV+ on June 12 instead of June 14 as originally planned. The star, whose Road House reboot has brought mixed reviews on Amazon Prime, is embracing the small screen for the first time since his appearance on Homicide: Life on the Street in 1994.

Jake Gyllenhaal’s in ‘Presumed Innocent’

Presumed Innocent is being produced by David E. Kelley, J.J. Abrams’ Bad Robot, and Warner Bros. It is an adaptation of Scott Turow’s 1990 film in which Harrison Ford plays a lawyer doing double duty as an investigator looking for the murderer of his colleague.

These types of sexy thrillers were popular in the ’90s and usually contained twist endings. Here’s the trailer for the original:

According to Deadline, Presumed Innocent doesn’t stray far from the source material: “…the Presumed Innocent series will explore obsession, sex, politics and the power and limits of love as the accused fights to hold his family and marriage together.”

Up next for Gyllenhaal is the Guy Ritchie action movie titled In the Grey scheduled for release in January 2025.

Presumed Innocent is an eight-episode limited series set to stream on AppleTV+ starting June 12.

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