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HOLIDAY HORRORS: Must-watch Movies for Thanksgiving!

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Written by Dr. Jose

Gobble, gobble, you jive-turkeys – it’s November! We may only be one week into the month, but Thanksgiving – that most fowl of holidays – is just around the corner, which means being extra gracious, charitable, and eating lots of foodstuff. If you’re a sick puppy like me, it’s as good a time as any to watch some real twisted junk – so plop down on the couch, unbuckle that belt, and draw the shades as I take you through my list of must-watch horror movies for Thanksgiving that the whole family is guaranteed to love.

bloodfreak

BLOOD FREAK (1972)

Some dude who looks Conway Twitty eats a turkey that’s been laced with experimental drugs. He passes out, but awakes soon afterwards to find that his head has been replaced with that of a wattle-necked gobbler. And suddenly he’s inexplicably addicted to the blood of drug addicts? This movie redefines crazy. There are a bunch of religious overtones (including scenes interspersed throughout wherein the narrator seems to chastise the viewer), and none of it makes much sense – so it’s perfect for that senile, zealot grandma you see once a year.

bloodrage

BLOOD RAGE (1983)

Twin brothers: one is a homicidal maniac, the other is innocent but locked up after being wrongfully accused of the murders. The guiltless brother escapes on Thanksgiving a decade later, and the crazy brother starts killing people again to make sure the better half gets locked up once more. Your jealous brother – the one who feels like the lesser loved of the two of you – he’s gonna love this one.

shining

THE SHINING (1980)

This film is all about family – and resisting the urge to brutally murder them. If that doesn’t scream Thanksgiving, I don’t know what does. Add that to all the Native American imagery and the fact that Jack takes over the hotel beginning in November, and I’m beginning to think this movie is actually an allegory for the horrors of Thanksgiving dinner with the family. Eat that, conspiracy theorists! The Shining is perfect for that uncle who likes to spend more time in the den with a bottle of scotch than with his wife and kid.

society

SOCIETY (1989)

All your mom wants to be is a contributing member of the neighborhood and respected by the community. Go to a couple of dinners, be invited to some parties. Maybe do a little shunting with the melty family up the street. Is that so much to ask?

homesweethome

HOME SWEET HOME (1981)

Body By Jake is a ‘roided up escaped mental patient who likes to inject PCP under his tongue – you know the type. There’s little plot to Home Sweet Home, our lead killer basically just wreaks havoc on Thanksgiving – in the process, mowing down an old lady with a car and killing a dude who looks like a second-hand member of the KISS Army. Not cool, Jake – not cool, at all. A perfect movie for your other uncle – the one who started going to the gym after his wife left him.

children

CHILDREN OF THE CORN (1984)

There’s little difference between the clan of strange cousins you know nothing about and only see once a year, and Isaac, Malachai, and the rest of those Pagan weirdos who worship He Who Walks Behind the Rows. A bunch of little Amish kids hanging out in a cornfield? This is about as Thanksgiving as it gets.

tcm

THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE (1974)

And last, but certainly not least – the ultimate family film – The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. No one appreciates family time around the dinner table for a nice hot meal more than the Sawyer clan. And if that hot meal just so happens to consist of the friends who stopped by to visit, well, so be it.

That’s all for now, but if you’re still hungry for more holiday gore after reading this list, why not make a plate of seconds and check out these other iHorror pieces on Thanksgiving horror!

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Another Creepy Spider Movie Hits Shudder This Month

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Good spider films are a theme this year. First, we had Sting and then there was Infested. The former is still in theaters and the latter is coming to Shudder starting April 26.

Infested has been getting some good reviews. People are saying that it’s not only a great creature feature but also a social commentary on racism in France.

According to IMDb: Writer/director Sébastien Vanicek was looking for ideas around the discrimination faced by black and Arab-looking people in France, and that led him to spiders, which are rarely welcome in homes; whenever they’re spotted, they’re swatted. As everyone in the story (people and spiders) is treated like vermin by society, the title came to him naturally.

Shudder has become the gold standard for streaming horror content. Since 2016, the service has been offering fans an expansive library of genre movies. in 2017, they began to stream exclusive content.

Since then Shudder has become a powerhouse in the film festival circuit, buying distribution rights to movies, or just producing some of their own. Just like Netflix, they give a film a short theatrical run before adding it to their library exclusively for subscribers.

Late Night With the Devil is a great example. It was released theatrically on March 22 and will begin streaming on the platform starting April 19.

While not getting the same buzz as Late Night, Infested is a festival favorite and many have said if you suffer from arachnophobia, you might want to take heed before watching it.

Infested

According to the synopsis, our main character, Kalib is turning 30 and dealing with some family issues. “He’s fighting with his sister over an inheritance and has cut ties with his best friend. Fascinated by exotic animals, he finds a venomous spider in a shop and brings it back to his apartment. It only takes a moment for the spider to escape and reproduce, turning the whole building into a dreadful web trap. The only option for Kaleb and his friends is to find a way out and survive.”

The film will be available to watch on Shudder starting April 26.

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Part Concert, Part Horror Movie M. Night Shyamalan’s ‘Trap’ Trailer Released

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In true Shyamalan form, he sets his film Trap inside a social situation where we aren’t sure what is going on. Hopefully, there is a twist at the end. Furthermore, we hope it’s better than the one in his divisive 2021 movie Old.

The trailer seemingly gives away a lot, but, as in the past, you can’t rely on his trailers because they are often red herrings and you are being gaslit to think a certain way. For instance, his movie Knock at the Cabin was completely different than what the trailer implied and if you hadn’t read the book on which the film is based it was still like going in blind.

The plot for Trap is being dubbed an “experience” and we aren’t quite sure what that means. If we were to guess based on the trailer, it’s a concert movie wrapped around a horror mystery. There are original songs performed by Saleka, who plays Lady Raven, a kind of Taylor Swift/Lady Gaga hybrid. They have even set up a Lady Raven website to further the illusion.

Here is the fresh trailer:

According to the synopsis, a father takes his daughter to one of Lady Raven’s jam-packed concerts, “where they realize they’re at the center of a dark and sinister event.”

Written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan, Trap stars Josh Hartnett, Ariel Donoghue, Saleka Shyamalan, Hayley Mills and Allison Pill. The film is produced by Ashwin Rajan, Marc Bienstock and M. Night Shyamalan. The executive producer is Steven Schneider.

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Woman Brings Corpse Into Bank To Sign Loan Papers

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Warning: This is a disturbing story.

You have to be pretty desperate for money to do what this Brazilian woman did at the bank to get a loan. She wheeled in a fresh corpse to endorse the contract and she seemingly thought the bank employees wouldn’t notice. They did.

This weird and disturbing story comes via ScreenGeek an entertainment digital publication. They write that a woman identified as Erika de Souza Vieira Nunes pushed a man she identified as her uncle into the bank pleading with him to sign loan papers for $3,400. 

If you’re squeamish or easily triggered, be aware that the video captured of the situation is disturbing. 

Latin America’s largest commercial network, TV Globo, reported on the crime, and according to ScreenGeek this is what Nunes says in Portuguese during the attempted transaction. 

“Uncle, are you paying attention? You must sign [the loan contract]. If you don’t sign, there’s no way, as I cannot sign on your behalf!”

She then adds: “Sign so you can spare me further headaches; I can’t bear it any longer.” 

At first we thought this might be a hoax, but according to Brazilian police, the uncle, 68-year-old Paulo Roberto Braga had passed away earlier that day.

 “She attempted to feign his signature for the loan. He entered the bank already deceased,” Police Chief Fábio Luiz said in an interview with TV Globo. “Our priority is to continue investigating to identify other family members and gather more information regarding this loan.”

If convicted Nunes could be facing jail time on charges of fraud, embezzlement, and desecration of a corpse.

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